Ep 267: Negative Feedback Loops + Reviving Love

This episode will hopefully give you an epiphany! Negative feedback loops have a huge impact on intimate relationships. They are also a major factor in self-perception: perception of your life and what others mean to you. We base our opinions of our relationships on the signals we receive from them, which, in turn, create return signals. There are two selves we inhabit: the “whole self” and the “fear self”. These two selves make very different decisions and they act from very different places. The fear self will come from childhood powerlessness where the motive is always to grasp for control and “fix it.” This self operates from a fictional and dysfunctional belief that it is possible and also our job to fix things. The whole self comes from truth. That self knows where the boundary between self and other stands. The whole self can detach with love when necessary and also see when they need to be accountable and give more. The goal is to always act from the whole self and also give love unconditionally. This episode has tools to get to that wholeness and also restore the love that gets eroded by negative feedback loops – the ones that occur when both parties are reacting from fear and a misinterpretation of the other person’s cues. SENDING LOVE!!! Sponsors:Betterhelp.com/helpmebeme - sign up and get 10% off your first month of therapyMonarch.com code HELPME for 50% off your first yearQuince.com/helpme for free shipping and 365 day returns Wayfair.com to shop all things homeMarleyspoon.com/offer/helpmebeme up to 25 FREE mealsHungryroot.com/HELPMEBEME and use code HELPMEBEME to get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices