How do you get your kid to take accountability for their mistakes?

815. Why do kids sometimes get defensive, shut down, or lash out after they’ve made a mistake, broken a rule or hurt someone’s feelings? In this episode, Dr. Nanika Coor explains how to compassionately help children notice their impact without shame, while helping them take meaningful steps toward repairing relationship ruptures through the action-based making of amends. 

Sources:

McCloud, C. (2018). Buckets, dippers, and lids: Secrets to your happiness. Bucket Fillers.

Sandland, B. (2025). Neurodivergent Experiences of Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria Expose the Environmental Factors too Often Overlooked. Neurodiversity, 3. https://doi.org/10.1177/27546330251394516

Related Project Parenthood Episodes:

Stop forcing your child to apologize

Repairing the Break: How to Fix Things with Your Kid

The First Step to Solve Child Behavior Problems

Dr. Coor’s Related Blog: A Stitch in Time Saves Nine: Relational Repair After Parent-Child Conflicts

Find a transcript here.

Have a parenting question? Email Dr. Coor at [email protected] or leave a voicemail at 646-926-3243.

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