
This is Episode 2 of The Legal Side of Separation with family lawyer Dani Zetzer from Respect Legal.
In this episode I am talking to Dani about separation, parenting arrangements and neurodivergent children and why the usual conversations about "fairness", equal time and 50/50 care often do not meet the needs of children who need more structure, regulation and support. Dani brings both her legal experience and her lived experience as a neurodivergent parent of neurodivergent children to this important discussion.
Together, we explore why separation can affect neurodivergent children differently, especially when routines change, handovers increase, therapies need to be managed across two households, or parents are not on the same page about diagnosis, medication or support. This episode looks at why parenting arrangements need to be built around the child in front of you and not what feels fair to the adults.
You'll hear Nikki and Dani discuss:
• Why 50/50 care is not automatically in a child's best interests • How separation and high conflict can affect neurodivergent children • Why routines, transitions and handovers matter so much • What happens when parents disagree about diagnosis or treatment • The role of mediation, parenting plans and parenting orders • Why parallel parenting may sometimes be more supportive than traditional co-parenting • How therapy, medication, NDIS supports and school needs can complicate parenting arrangements • Why the family law system is limited when it comes to complex children's needs • How parents can shift from "what is fair to me?" to "what does my child need?" • Why finding the right professional support matters
This is a powerful and practical conversation for any parent navigating separation with a neurodivergent child, or any parent who feels like the system does not fully understand their child. Because parenting after separation is not about dividing children in half. It is about creating arrangements that help them feel safe, supported and able to cope.
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ResourcesIf you are experiencing family violence, coercive control, financial abuse, or have concerns about your safety, please seek professional support immediately.
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Host: Nikki Parkinson, TEDx Speaker, Divorce Doula, Coach and Founder of The Divorce and Separation Hub.
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