4:7 After the Anger: An IFS Look at Repair

In this episode, Susan explores what happens after Lawyer or Dictator mode has taken over and you've lost your cool. She explains why the goal isn't to stay serene all the time, and why genuine repair, done well, teaches a child that relationships can survive rupture. Susan breaks down the steps of effective repair like, and why a quick "I'm sorry, but..." doesn't count.

• How rupture followed by real repair teaches a child that conflict doesn't mean the end of connection.
• Why it's okay if your child doesn't respond warmly to your apology.
• How naming your "parts" to your child can open the door to greater connection.   Full transcript here