Ep. #309: The Nuances of Grief We Haven't Known How to Name

Have you ever wondered why you can’t seem to “let go”—even when you know that someone is gone ... or a relationship has changed ... or a season is over?Things are different. And yet you keep reaching for the conversation, the connection, or the sense of belonging you once had.Recognizing that we’re still discovering new layers of what we’ve lost can help us stop beating ourselves up for “hanging on too long” or “refusing to let go.”

Today, I’m sharing two personal reflections on grief: missing my dear friend Sarah Marie, who passed away just over a year ago while also grieving changes in my understanding of a relationship with someone who is still with us.

Naming our particular losses can help us understand our reactions, soften our self-judgment, and consider what we need as the holidays approach.

Instead of pressuring ourselves to “just let go already,” we can be curious and compassionate about all we’re still missing.

Links Mentioned:

• Your Holiday Grief Game Plan
  • https://cherifletcher.com/your-holiday-game-plan/
• "Am I a Highly Sensitive Person?" Quiz
  • https://CheriGregory.com/hspquiz/

Chapters

• (00:00:00) - Introduction: Missing what's gone or changed
• (00:01:11) - Welcome to Grit and Grace
• (00:02:19) - Two experiences of loss and the holidays
• (00:03:24) - Remembering Sarah Marie: the 'yes, and' friend
• (00:06:38) - Evaluation apprehension and needing a sounding board
• (00:08:09) - How the brain processes grief as searching
• (00:10:06) - Panic, fear, and losing someone (or something)
• (00:11:34) - Grieving a changed relationship with a living parent
• (00:13:10) - Searching for old narratives and self-compassion
• (00:15:17) - Closing reflections and self-compassion invitation
• (00:16:13) - Holiday Grief Game Plan workshop details
• (00:18:02) - Closing notes and podcast sign-off